Gothard's 49 Character Qualities

To quote Dr Phil should we grade the Duggars' paper?

Due to some reading I did this morning, I ran into the IBLP 49 character qualities again and couldn't help notice a few that Jim Bob especially seems to have forgotten.  Promptness so as not to waste others' time? 

The qualities are listed here.

25 comments:

mom in texas said...

Thanks for posting this character list. It's laughable at best. I spotted a few off top that the Duggars lack:
Cautiousness, um yeah right.

Creativity: ALL the kids names start with a "J". Seriously.

Contentment:Obviously they are not content with what they have as they are well on their way to 20 children.

Orderliness:There is always chaos at the Duggar home. Actually there is always chaos whereever they go.

Puctuality: Duggar time. Need I say more?

Self-Control: 20 kids

Wisdom: Jim Bob. That is all.

Seriously while some of these qualities are great and lots of people who are not like the Duggars attain them, it should not be wrong if someone doesn't. I guess the Duggars are still working on them as well. Now I know where Michelle gets her vocabulary from. These are some of her favorite words.

Rainbow68 said...

Oh, dear. Where to begin? I feel somewhat qualified to respond to this as I may be one of the few ex-Gothardites in the group. As a young woman almost 20 years ago, I attended both the Basic and Advanced Seminars. I've also met Jim Sammons, who changed Jim Bob and Michelle's view on finances, in person. While no one can argue with the list of character qualities complete with corresponding scriptures, Gothard takes things further. As a Christian, I was able to seek God myself for wisdom when it was time to marry. No parent was needed, except for support. The Duggars do seem to miss the boat on time management - I say this as a mom of 2, not 20. It's the way they shrug it off and even have a name for their presumption of tardiness. A lot of the Gothard info is linked with scripture that is taken out of context. Gothard also teaches that ALL music except for hymns and classical is wrong. He provides some convoluted explanation concerning piano keys - white being wholesome, black being carnal. More than anything, I want the Duggar kids to be protected, but also allowed to develop and function in the world. There is also a fixation on sex and the prevention thereof that borders on unhealthy - Nike, hideous and strange swimsuits come to mind. Boldness vs. Fearfulness - There is a fear of life off of the compound, not of boldly starting your own life. Please understand that Gothard believes ALL young people should remain with their parents until married, not just the girls - hence, John David. They are definitely compassionate. Kudos for that one. They are also deferential, diligent, gentle, hospitable, and thrifty. They are, like all of us, a mixed bag. Their hearts seem pure, but they have gotten a giant dose of iffy theology.

Judy said...

It's the way they shrug it off and even have a name for their presumption of tardiness

I personally believe that when people are constantly late to everything, it's a sign of narcissim. Like I am so important that I can't be bothered to respect the person I'm meeting with or when I come in late, everyone pays attention to me, even if it's negative attention. I'm pretty sure Jim Bob has this problem. He almost gloats about being late.

The Roaming Commoner said...

Oh my gosh, the Duggars use these "qualities" as a standard but the way I see it, they flop every time. The qualities of orderliness, punctuality, and creativity were pretty much shot down years ago. They are always on "Duggar time", their house is chaos, and self control should have been implemented over a dozen children back.

The Roaming Commoner said...

The tardiness is very much reflective (the way I see it) of a careless and selfish mentality. I notice this especially in Michelle's princess like attitude.

tulip said...

Rainbow68...thanks for your post! I agree!

What I still don't understand is why parents feel the need to isolate their kids in a protective bubble as young adults. If The Bible says teach up your children in the way they should go, and when they are old they will not depart from it, and if they're trusting God in how they raised their children, then it's time to let them free! They need to know who they are as individuals, and how to deal with life experiences that challenge their beliefs!

BTW, I just had to add this...I watched the clip from The Today Show interview again after reading more comments and rolled my eyes to the point of no return! Did anyone else notice after breaking the news of expecting their 20th child, Jim Bob joked (ha ha-NOT) "I don't know how it happened!", and Josh belted out this loud belly laugh like that was the funniest thing he ever heard? Ugh!

Patrice said...

Gothard also teaches that ALL music except for hymns and classical is wrong. He provides some convoluted explanation concerning piano keys - white being wholesome, black being carnal.
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omg! Seriously? Even if I had any intention of becoming a Gothardite, when I got to that page, I would truly laugh and throw the book into the fire. This guy sounds like maybe he went on a bad LSD trip in the sixties and never quite recovered.

The Roaming Commoner said...

From what I can tell from researching Gothard and his beliefs, it is a very legalistic system. He appears to control (or at least try to control) his followers in every way. I seriously doubt that any independent thoughts or questions are allowed in his system or in the Duggar house.

Seriously? said...

Gothard. Geez. Where to start? His list reads like a 2nd grade dictionary. Seriously, is it necessary to write this stuff down for his flock? My German Shepherd knows to behave without malice or pretense and does it without the likes of a Gothard spelling it all out like this list.

Love what Mom in Tx says. Amen to her comment. All of it.

Wonder if these Michelle-isms are more Gothard 'wisdom':

"fellowshipping" (can't people just spend time together - does it have to be 'fellowshipping' AS IF spending time in Duggar World is some blessed, ethereal event

"sweet" Someone please buy Michelle Duggar a thesaurus, as she overuses the word, 'sweet' to such an extent that, coming from her, it is trite and meaningless

"purity" (AS IF kissing before marriage is IMpure)

"conservative values" (always used to define moral superiority over liberal ideologies)

"raise up our children" - Raise UP?

"baggage": see "purity" above

It's my opinion that Gothard and the Duggars are just a big and marketed pile of superficial rhetoric and pious platitudes.

Seriously? said...

"Gothard also teaches that ALL music except for hymns and classical is wrong. He provides some convoluted explanation concerning piano keys - white being wholesome, black being carnal."

IMO any time a person is THIS obsessed with sexuality, it is a big red flag. Something here is askew, IMO.

Seriously? said...

"I personally believe that when people are constantly late to everything, it's a sign of narcissim"
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I agree. It's not about how BUSY they are, it's about 'being on Duggar time' and oddly PROUD of it.

I also find the Duggar parental take on their 20 pregnancies as God's special favor to THEM highly prideful. Am I to believe that couples who badly want children but are unable to conceive are LESS worthy and, therefore, LESS favored by god?

Patrice said...

"
IMO any time a person is THIS obsessed with sexuality, it is a big red flag. Something here is askew, IMO."
ITA. Sometimes I wonder if Gothard is just laughing all the way to the bank at how many people he has managed to fool. Does anyone really know what he is like? For all we know, he could be a huge pervert,orgies every night, heavy metal music, cocaine stashed all over the house...and fooling the Duggars and their ilk into following some nonsense he just thought up one night...like I said before, on a bad trip. There is no way someone could be serious about this set of rules.

sandi said...

>He provides some convoluted explanation concerning piano keys - white being wholesome, black being carnal."

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wow..examine that one a bit closer.I think Gothard's true agnda shines thru here,esp. in terms of race.JMO.

londonbridges said...

Yikes, and I was raised in a strict, conservative denomination.

The black and white key issue just makes me feel creepy and slightly ill.

The Duggar time issue is just plain rude and narcissistic (sp?). They appear to be far more important than the people who are made to wait and wait and wait. I really don't care if it takes 2 hours to load everyone up in vehicles. That is the direct result of having a very large family. Plan ahead, Duggars and make God and Gothard proud of your being on time. JMO.

londonbridges said...

Attentiveness v unconcern...showing the worth of a person by giving undivided attention to his/her words and emotions. JimBob and Ms. Canada, at the Habitat build. She was trying to speak, and he rudely interupted her, and flapped his gums and had to tell the world that he and his family take every opportunity to help others in times of need. She never did finish her comments, and I for one, would like to know what she was feeling. The family helping out was a tad prideful IMHO. We all know that TLC foots some of the bills, and then hands over a pay-cheque to boot.

Truthfulness v deception. Josie having a cold, and the reality was much more serious. She was still in Israel with Michelle and her sister/mommy Jill. JMHO.

The Roaming Commoner said...

I don't know about racism in Gothard's teachings or in the Duggars beliefs. However, I hope that they are not (though it wouldn't surprise me). The religion does seem elitist with the couple that has the most "blessings" being on top.

Just Me said...

I agree with the above comments about Gothard's obsession with sex/sexual thoughts. I've been thinking for a while that anyone, much less an unmarried childless man, that endlessly harrangues on this must have some deep dark fetishes hidden in his closet.

londonbridges said...

I agree with the obsession about sex/sexual thoughts as well. I wonder in the inner soul of Mr. Gothard what secrets, fetishes, etc. are truly there. Men who are in leadership positions and are deemed the only 'true' teacher really frighten me. Gothardism is not for me, but I do agree that freedom of religion is a right we have. I guess it's each to his own. However, in the Duggar family, the laws of Gothard are the standard to abide by, and that includes all the blessings. I hope there will be some of them who will break away, make their own choices, and change some of their beliefs.

A girl can hope....

Lindy said...

I think Mr. Gothard himself is a college graduate, having obtained a BA, MA, and PhD. So, why he would tell his followers to not support educating their offspring beyond home schooling is baffling to me. I doubt Jill will ever get her nursing degree, mainly because it comes across as an afterthought, and we don't see her studying much for her CollegeMinus or CLEP exams. But maybe she will surprise us all, and leave the Duggar compound.

The 49 qualities are not rocket science. Mr. Gothard merely puts his spin on the qualities and mixes in Christian ideals.

I also think Mr. Gothard has an unhealthy obsession with suppressing sexual urges in others (and possibly himself). Since he never married, can we assume he never "courted"? Does this mean he is a virgin? LOL.

Seriously? said...

"I think Mr. Gothard himself is a college graduate.. So, why he would tell his followers to not support educating their offspring beyond home schooling is baffling to me."

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IMO it's because knowledge is POWER and if you want a bunch of nodding, baa-ing sheep, best to keep them uneducated so as to keep them blindly compliant and in awe of your supposed wisdom.

Re: Gothard's possible virginity: AS IF virginity defines morality - HA! There is so much more to life and ethics than Gothard/Duggar obsession with all things sexual.

Can't See Sheep said...

Lindy said...
I think Mr. Gothard himself is a college graduate, having obtained a BA, MA, and PhD. So, why he would tell his followers to not support educating their offspring beyond home schooling is baffling to me.
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This makes me think of history, all the leaders, religious & political who have purposely kept their followers under educated/ poorly educated, whatever you wish to call it, never has it amounted to any good for those followers. It has always been to their detriment. Like Seriously? said, knowledge is power.

Hannah Leah said...

It scares me. They lack a lot of them.

The one bugs me a lot is how cheap they are. They don`t even buy beds for the youngest..


Or how the are fine with Being late. I wonder if anyone shut the door saying sorry your late, please come back some other time.

ennvee said...

Jill will never get a real degree. She was filmed by a fan at a booksigning last weekend and the person asked if she was studying to become a nurse. Jill's response? She is still "THINKING about it" and is instead working with a midwife. Man, these people bend the truth into massive pretzels of logic.

Speaking of circular logic, someone at Recovering Grace posted Gothard's full "stance" against secular (especially rock) music. He conveniently forgets that Mozart and other composers of classical music were considered scandalous in their time.

http://www.recoveringgrace.org/2011/11/the-phony-consequences-of-rock-music/#more

Click on the image to read the "official" text and biblical quotes that Gothard doctors (as explained in the article) to fit his own twisted version of the truth.

Melissa said...

I will say that I agree with Jim Bob on one thing when it comes to a college education: Make sure you have an actual career in mind, don't just go to college to get a degree. I worked hard to get scholarships to pay for college to get my nursing degree. I'm currently going to school for my Master's degree for Geriatric Nurse Practitioner. With that said, I have a specific career in mind. I know several people who have gone to college and now have trouble finding a job in that area. And they have tons of school loans to pay off. Especially with the economy the way it is, it's a risk.
If Jill is still "deciding" on whether she wants to be a nurse, I say it doesn't hurt for her to take some of these basic classes with CollegePlus! that can lead her into a community college.
Just my opinion.

ennvee said...

Another troubling article from Recovering Grace regarding girls growing up in ATI and the pressures (and guilt) put on them to appear perfect.

http://www.recoveringgrace.org/2011/11/keeping-up-appearances/#more