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2. No online petitions.
3. Do not be rude about the children or call them names. Commenting on the behaviour that we have seen is acceptable, but no name calling.
4. Do not refer to calling CPS or use the term child abuse unless we something that actually is abusive.
5. Watch profanity.
6. Don't tell the moderators how to run the blog.
7. Be careful about boards on boards and please don't discuss or provide links to other Duggar boards.
8. No diagnosing mental/medical conditions.
9. No posting addresses.
10. Along with not being rude don't tell other people how to think, act, or behave - don't try to tell other people what to do or not do.
11. No using the kids' names or moderators' as your screen name.
12. Comments including "I'm sure you won't print this" will never be printed.
13. No unsolicited recaps. We are not recapping the Duggar shows.
14. The administrators are not able to verify the identity of people who comment here. Believe what you choose to believe.
15. Please use proper grammar, spelling, capitalizations and punctuations in your comments. No instant message type speaking.
16. Please refrain from beating the dead horses such as Josh's years ago expressed interest in law school. If the Duggars have moved on, so should we.
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415 comments:
«Oldest ‹Older 401 – 415 of 415Anonymous, here is the difference with what the Duggars did with Josie, and abortion;
The Duggars DELIVERED their child, and tried to save her.
Abortion KILLS the baby, sucking the brains out while in Utero and delivers a dead child.
I am sure that if Michelle would have had eclampsia earlier, they would have done the same thing; but the baby would have died.
The situation does bring up the question though, doesn't it? Are they now for abortion in the case of saving the life of the mother?
this is each kid should have her/his own room. if a kid is sick they stay in the room and have someone who already was sick help them..
or at least have the sick kids go to other house
and have josie etc stay in lr.
I believe I read somewhere (or heard somewhere) that Michelle weans her babies around 5 or 6 months of age. Is this the time when they are assigned to a buddy?
Also, how does the sleeping arrangements work in that case? I have a 5 month-old who definitely does not "sleep through the night".
Do M & JB keep the babies until they do? If not, does the latest addition get put into the dormitory-style room with all the other children?
Who looks after night feedings and how do they sleep decently with a baby (or several) waking up all the time?
Just curious. I know I'm thinking twice about another baby b/c the sleep deprivation is a real killer. Michelle must not deal with it on a regular basis, or she must cope exceptionally if she does!
Does anyone know for certain where the Duggars are residing? Have they relocated to their own home or are they still in Little Rock? That is, when they are not travelling to other states, etc.
Does anyone know for certain where Josie is living, and with whom?
Interesting article in Los Angeles Times today regarding protection for children appearing in Reality TV. It is entitled "Children's Role is Blurry in Reality TV" by Matea Gold and Rchard Verrier.
Bottom line, no work permit = no pay, and no protection. Read it and see what you think.
http://www.latimes.com/entertainment/news/tv/la-et-reality-kids-20100627,0,939452.story
Anonymous (who is asking who does the "night work/shift") associated with being a "buddy" of a young baby - that is a very good question. I've asked that question many times both in my head and on various forums and I've never received an answer. Five and six month babies do NOT sleep during the night (for those that have babies that do, that is excellent, but we did not, and we have 7 children). Babies are not little doll babies who can be covered with a blanket at night and slumber until morning. Many wake up during the night with colic, teething, sickness, diapers need to be changed (babies don't wait until daylight to wet or soil their diapers), and of course, many babies need to be fed during the night. SO, who does this work? Jim Bob or Michelle Duggar or the "buddy"??? If it's the latter, that is a TRAVESTY!!! The Duggar older girls should not be doing the parental night duty; it should be the parents - period!!! And if they can't handle it, then it's time to hire a night-time nanny. I cannot imagine laying in bed with my husband sleeping peacefully knowing that my older girls are waking up in the middle of the night doing all the work that my husband and I should be doing. If this IS what is happening, then it is no wonder that these kids can't go to school. They HAVE to be kept at home because they would never be able to focus at school with never getting a good night's sleep. I highly doubt that these poor girls have time for advanced education, even at home, considering that so much of their time is spend in being a "buddy" to their younger siblings, doing housework, cooking, etc. There is no way that this sort of thing would fly in the real world.
It is no wonder that so many of these families live in their little hermetically-sealed worlds, associating only with those that are just like them. They get to avoid a lot of accountability that way.
"Anonymous (who is asking who does the "night work/shift") associated with being a "buddy" of a young baby - that is a very good question. I've asked that question many times both in my head and on various forums and I've never received an answer."
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I think you've never received an answer on that question, because the Duggar "Night Shift" as you call it, has never been shown on the tv shows. So no one has been able to say yes, the girls take care of the kids during the night or no, the girls don't take care of the kids at night. It's one of those questions, that we can make logical assumptions about, but never really know.
Personally, I like the Duggars, but I also agree that it would be logical to think that the girls do take care of the kids during the night. I think the only little one that michelle takes care of is her "Buddy" which would be josie at this point.
While I may not like the idea that the older girls have to get up to change diapers or get water for the younger kids, I can only imagine what it would be like for Michelle to have to do that for all the little ones right now.
We don't know if the girls do the night shift as well but we do know there are pack n plays in their rooms and we have seen some of the younger boys waking up in the girls beds. I wouldn't doubt that as soon as the new baby arrives the next in line moves in with the girls.
It would be hard for Michelle to get up and take care of the needs of HER children in the night but they are HER children and it is HER responsibility to do that. Wouldn't hurt Jim Bob to get up and help out instead of having girls do it. One of the many reasons people think if you can't do those things for the children you have, then you shouldn't be brining anymore in to "not" take care of.
Ally said:
"While I may not like the idea that the older girls have to get up to change diapers or get water for the younger kids, I can only imagine what it would be like for Michelle to have to do that for all the little ones right now."
That's ridiculous - Michelle should certainly be the one to get up with her young children - just because you imagine it would be difficult is no reason that she shouldn't be doing it. She should have had to face how difficult it would be long before now, instead of handing off each infant as soon as the baby was weaned and getting a full night's sleep (and apparently lots of intimate time with JB) at the expense of the health and well being of her older children.
I think if Michelle had been the kind of dragged out exhausted that caring for her own children would have resulted in, there might be less of leaving it up to god and more of honey, I can't, I'm too tired and I have a headache. If she wants to over-populate her corner of the world with more uneducated children, she should have to pay the piper and care for those children, regardless of how hard it was for her. Maybe she would have gotten so exhausted she would have wondered why JB wasn't getting up at night to help, too . . .
Michelle should certainly be the one to get up with her young children - just because you imagine it would be difficult is no reason that she shouldn't be doing it.
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Absolutely. There is joy in having children, but part of the joy is taking care of them and raising them. Being the one who soothes the fevered brow in the middle of the night, or looks into the eyes as you feed the hungry child, or walk and walk and walk in circles to calm a night terror or an upset stomach, that is what it is about Its not fun, but it is mothering. If you can't take the time to do this, you should limit procreating to a manageable number. Sure you don't get much sleep when your kids are young, but that is part of mothering. Michelle looks way too rested to be actually mothering her babies.
"I think if Michelle had been the kind of dragged out exhausted that caring for her own children would have resulted in, there might be less of leaving it up to god and more of honey, I can't, I'm too tired and I have a headache. If she wants to over-populate her corner of the world with more uneducated children, she should have to pay the piper and care for those children, regardless of how hard it was for her. Maybe she would have gotten so exhausted she would have wondered why JB wasn't getting up at night to help, too . . ."
Yes, you are 100% correct. Anyone who is a parent, regardless of size, knows the back-breaking labor that is involved in raising a child from infant to adult. My oldest is now 26 and the youngest is 8. I've seen the full spectrum and at this point in my life, I AM tired (age 47). My husband (49) is tired too. Jim-Bob and Michelle are tired too, I'm sure, even though they are a few years younger (and certainy have more children). None of us are robots that can function non-stop 24/7.
This "buddy" system that is used by the Duggars seems to be something prevalent in their religious circle. I think a lot more is expected of children in this model than what is expected in a normal home. I believe in children helping, but having children raising their own siblings is BEYOND helping or being a "buddy." It is taking advantage of a child simply for the fact that they are being raised to be obedient, never question parental authority, and they are taught to practice "J.O.Y."
Another thing that just bothers me to no end is Michelle saying that she is the new baby's "buddy" until weaned and then he/she becomes the older sibling's "buddy". Michelle is NOT their "buddy." She is their mother/mom/mommy and Jim Bob is their father. She makes it sound like the responsibility "transfers" over to the older sibling at some point, and thus "relieves" her of the day and night-time duty of being a mom. I don't understand this type of thinking. The Duggar parents are responsible for the infant care at night for the baby unless they hire someone to come in at night or have a family member take turns or something.
I'm not a heartless monster (and neither is anyone on this board), but it is sort of unfuriating when Michelle gets "Mother of the Year" award by Vision Forum when it is such a ruse and everyone knows it. Like John Lennon said, "How can you sleep (at night)"? The thought of a pre-teen or a teen child not getting sleep at night because they have been straddled with the responsibility of taking care of their sibling 24/7 is something that is detestable to me. Nothing else matters.
For people who supposedly "love children", they show it it a funny way. Allowing children to be children is what is "normal." There is a time for every season and a time for every purpose under heaven (if that's what they believe). Turning a child into an adult because of necessity (because JB and/or Michelle can't/won't handle the infant care of the baby) is wrong on so many levels. I'm just constantly amazed what goes unchecked in this country due to "religious freedom." I am okay with the Duggar parents living according to their beliefs, but why must the children be denied the joy and care-free moments that childhood brings? Childhood passes so quickly as is, why take it away from them so quickly just because they bit off more than they can chew. Again, I am not saying that they are horrible parents; they certainly have their heart in the right place, but I do honestly think that their religious guru and his model is damaging to children, especially female children who are expected to become little mothers so early on in life.
A poster indicated it would be too difficult for M to take care of HER little blessings during the night right now. It ought to be just a given that M and JB should be the care-givers especially at night. If they believe that God blesses them with these little ones, then God would enable them to raise them also IMO. God provides and that ought to include the health and strength to be parents. The buddies should not be taking over parental duties and obligations full-time after a blessing is weaned.
As I recall, the first 12 months of my childrens' lives were full of various excitements, which often arrived during the night: ear infections - why do they always seem to manifest at night? whooping cough; various colds and coughs; and once, pneumonia.
To a lesser degree, this also went on during the second 12 months as well.
It is mommy and daddy's responsibility to be the one who is there during the night to take care of the babies they willingly chose to make. It is not the responsibility of the older daughters of the household, no matter how tired mommy might be. Ma Duggar wants to have the babies, then Ma Dugger needs to be on deck caring for those babies.
I don't think there is any question whatsoever who does the "Night Shift" at the Duggar home. We have seen the Pack-n-plays in the Girls' room. It's disgraceful that Johanna was still sleeping in one this year, at age four; for a couple of nights on vacation MAYBE, although I only used them for vacations for my babies or toddlers, never a big preschool girl like Johanna. Imagine how uncomfortable and bad for her back that is. And Jenny and Jordyn are in them too.
We know that Jordyn was moved into the girls' room, because we have seen her in a swing sleeping in there, and because she is in the pack-n-play to nap there too.
The boys crawl in with their sisters too. Ugh.
I know how hard it was to get up with my kids when they were small, but I had those kids, so it was my responsibility. If I had my sleep interrupted every night of the week by my siblings, while my mother slept soundly, or was doing her wifely duty, I would absolutely scream.
It just isn't right at all. Michelle should be taking care of her own babies.
anyone sdee this?
http://hot.aol.com/2010/06/29/duggar-baby-19-comes-home/?icid=main|aim|dl8|link3|http%3A%2F%2Fhot.aol.com%2F2010%2F06%2F29%2Fduggar-baby-19-comes-home%2F
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